Friday, March 10, 2017

a true understanding of terms such as 'vulnerability' and 'abuse' and 'context'

Understanding the human being as a entity, seems to have died and our humanity has become a robotic sense that we exist but yet we no longer are placed as individuals.  We no longer hold levels of spirit and soul, compassion, empathy, sorrow, hurt, joy and comittement.
when people are vulnerable, we all recognise this word, but hardly absorb it or its real definition and the consequences on both society and the individual.

it is not enough to know the lexicon of words used.

Vulnerable, isn't the same as 'weak' or 'weaker' or 'less important' or 'needy' or even that they/we are without capacity.

Vulnerable is a kind word, for placing a person who is either a hurt individual, a person unable to withstand the slings and arrows those with more shaped brains and stronger psyche can withstand.  Vulnerable people can be a creation or product of an abusive society, family dynamic or sexual abuse, or being born different through no fault of their/our own.   They also demand attention.  Attention means too, that vulnerable people are not 'set apart' because they are such, but need just further attention and awareness in order to slot into the greater scheme of humanity.
Vulnerable people are not devoid of soul, spirit, intelligence, humanity nor are they useless, ineffective or uncaring or a piece of humanity that have no feeling as if some intrinsic part of them doesn't even exist, so if it doesn't exist, therefore 'how would vulnerable people know they are being abused!'

there are many classes of vulnerable people so the broad term of 'vulnerable' can apply to a learning disabled child or adult, a person who has had a protracted period of trauma which they cannot ever hope to recover from, or they present as someone 'different' or 'with difference'  that set them apart and can face a life of the inhumane bullying done to them by this very difference being either obvious or oblique.
so in real terms, its not simplistic to use the term at all.

Doctors can and are in some cases vulnerable.  Many highly placed individuals in society present on the autism spectrum for instance, their intellect has therefore offered them their value and place in a sophisticated strata of society and humanity, but it can never remove us or them from the ideas around what we consider a vulnerability within, that has to be cushioned against abuse, because brilliant people may not be that good at dealing with a trashing.

Abuse now is another word.  this particular one is rather loosely and over-used.
over use of the words, abuse, or abusive or verbally abusive, is emotive and destructive.
for the line blurs and it loses 'weight' in translation.
when Abuse occurs, its profoundly damaging, its not a slight on character or emotion, its very damaging.

it is wrong to use this term on the same continuim  or degree and place for instance a person who has been traumatised through rape or sexual abuse and who may scream blue murder if further threatened by society in a different context that reminds them of their initial abuse, or places them terrified of further abuse.
screaming and crying from a traumatised once abused individual, can be used against them.

they are pronounced 'verbally abusive' and phones are slammed down.
Guards can be called if a vulnerable traumatised woman who is verbally 'abusive' present in such a distressed state to 'State caring' (HSE) individuals, but then how do you determine this level of stress and vulnerability and the effects on that persons psyche so such lose using of words such as 'verbally abusive/aggressive, can be humanely applied within context of that persons past, or present or communication deficits, lack of sophistication or communications through difference?

it takes 'sophistication' and it also takes 'intelligence'  and 'up-skilling' within a work force who has at its heart a modis operande to work with the sick, vulnerable, needy and frail.

it is NEVER up to a vulnerable, traumatised individual with difference to attempt to smooth passages of work life ease for a professional!

Professionals chose their career path, and although no person should be having a hard time in the work place, it is up to  the professional at all times to work professionally with compassion and understanding.

to understand 'vulnerability,'  'abuse', 'communication skills' and 'difference' means very  much understanding these words, past the definitions, because the words themselves are all understood, but can be translated either intentionally, or with intentional harmful effect on an individual.
understanding of these words means true understanding so that if a person is any such thing, you have to see them in context and this context is like a large pillar of balanced bricks, placed one on top of the other, if you pull one out of place, the whole shabuddle falls down into pieces on the floor no longer even recognisable as a strong pillar before your eyes.
taking the bricks away, a type of coping strength of bricks upon bricks, is tearing a person down, brick by brick, until a quivering mass on the floor of the professional's society's remit of care.

to damage in such a profound way is unprofessional and abusive and its never up to the abused to attempt 'repair of process' when the damage has been done.

Repairing takes effort and committment.

This blog has been written in context.

Recently viewing HSE FOI files, i see that a certain social worker has written a dated list of 'verbally agressive/incidents' in tabulated format, one after the other on sheets of paper.

I am that verbally agressive, abusive individual! I claim that a rocky start in adult live which included clerical sexual abuse, and rape, who has known frontal lobe brain damage and lesions on the brain like dandruff, plus is severely/profoundly deafened, had a very rough start to trying to attempt fit in in a modern society which had already huge expectations.
i also was on the autism spectrum, and more of this anon.
but to see on files tabulation without any context of history, degree of trauma, effects of trauma and abuse is very very wrong, unprofessional, and denies me, a known vulnerable individual, any right to say it otherwise, for the professional has 'spoken.'

Learning about the dynamic of trauma and stress on communication is also a skill and i do believe the professionals we are producing and who hang on in jobs within the HSE of professional clout and with remit over vulnerable people who castigate their client base and begin either witch hunts or labels or defamation need to be routed out and re-deployed away from their clients as they are damaging professionals, and ought not to be within sniffing distance of people who are sensitive or traumatised.
professionals who overload an individual and add to trauma are perpertuating abuse, and committing further more damaging abuse on that person.

Most within the HSE know of my past, that of clerical abuse, deafness, brain damage, and autism.
I am still being abusively treated with no let up at all.
the 'groupthink' has now become an 'embedded' acceptable practise against an individual, who has no rights of reply and a person who consistently tries to 'repair' her reputation, through her wish to educate her abusers of state of her starting point.
THEY know my physical and emotional psyche and damage of the past, but yet, all the while, the disconnect of 'context' with 'labelling' is massive, so great,  its an agreed pathway for professionals.

they actively seek out this disconnect and refuse to connect the dots of data from past to present to promote an image/dynamic of prejudice against me, a person who can never repair a professional stance for the client has no real strength against 'groupthink.'
If its that strong not even the strongest individual would have enough strength to fight an abusive force such as, within the HSE our health caring institution.

how abusive is it?
it is very abusive.
the very fact that a social worker can actually go through files and rewrite ONLY the times Ann screamed and shouted in dire distress and put on the top of the page 'incidences of verbal abuse/agression' and no more is very dangerous indeed.

such things too as denial of past, of diagnosis etc is rife.
we look at the diagnosis of being on the autism spectrum, a late enough diagnosis but one made all the same.
the files show a complete and utter shambles of inability to grasp this nettle.

From callous 'throw-away-remarks' after meeting me for five or ten minutes 'she doesn't have Asperger' claimed by a person who has some training in psychological dynamics.  
Other statements on file are direct, 'she has been diagnosed with Asperger'
she went to see Dr .....blank blank and blankedy blank....and she 'claims that Dr. blank states she does fit the criteria for having an autism spectrum disorder.' (name of this doctor has been erased, which is beyond my comprehension)
we then have, 'can we have Dr. So-and-So look at this report to see if he can verify if it is correct?'
Well, the Dr. in question never assessed me and claims 'it doesn't look much of a report and we do not know if the person, Dr. blank has the skills to diagnose this condition.'
so we then have a HSE official inform the HSE to ignore it altogether.

this is wonderfully professional.

the Dr. Blank in question is very much a Dr KNOW, and is considered as one of the tops in her field and recognised as such.

to be debating as clustered non skilled individuals, a paper sheet of investigation that took more in than a brief summary of final report, is bizarre.  it is an nervousness around 'skills.'

to tell the HSE to 'forget it mate on this one!' is utterly bizarre in extreme.

the diagnosis was made through the proper sophisticated known skill of a doctor with a high speciality remit to make such a diagnosis, for unskilled members of the HSE to huddle around a piece of paper and finally ignore it, is bizarre, in so far as the doctor of psychiatry didn't seem to even know the investigator, another bizarre part of all of this.

Can psychiatrists as a group, know the skills of other professionals, if they do not know this client and never assessed her, but yet deny that of another professional who did?

what i am getting here in this blog, is 'the irish way' of redefining the object.
redefining to conform to their own context which is exceedingly limited, is dangerous.
redefining out of context of any sophistication is dangerous.
labelling out of context is extremely dangerous.
tracking through the system, that is from local area to general managers a dynamic of redefinition without professional skills is called 'groupthink' and allowing a pervasive, massive injustice to prevail and tarnish an individual to such an extent as to ruin her life entirely is called in my mind, not only an evil, because its inexcusable.
we are talking about professionals we entrust to care for the weakest in society.

we never expect them to twart, tar or misrepresent the truth of an individual, nor do we expect them to brandish lists around, from one discipline to another about a single individual with one intent.
To destroy.  To destroy good character and personality to their own end, not for any real professional skilled analysis, but to misrepresent in a crass manner and disallow the voice of intelligent representation of individuals, namely myself.   I claim to own this intelligence, enough to represent my own psyche and character, i have always admitted and can show qualified clarity around my own history, dynamic, cause and effect and trauma and stress and communication and deafness.

to date, the lists endure, the assassination has been done, the bricks of strength that allow this human being to be part of society are being slowly dismantled by an institution i call corrupt of moral justice and intellect, which cannot now define the difference between a truth and a lie, a right from wrong and admit mistakes and to have the ability to move on once doing so and try reframe an individual in a far more correct way.

consistently they wish the reframing to be done by the abused person, not them, who have been so abusive.
moulding me into submissive compliance and to submit myself to more of the same, is an evil in itself.
i hold massive truths about myself, a believe in my integrity as a human being is strong, my ability to not be able to lie is actually for me, counter productive, but i am unable to lie.
to be able to say it from the hip as truth unwashed down, is a disconcerting confrontation with those who have a subtle agenda and are unused to clearly saying it as it is.

i present as a 'problem'  i SEE too much of a crooked dynamic, but i cannot mould my ability to be blunt to being that of skilled diplomat and no matter how hard they try to make me into someone i am not, what they see, they will get.

but what they chose to extract from that without context, then they are presenting with the PROBLEM and how they project that problem onto their client is devious, mischievous and very destructive, but NOT to the Organisation.
Only to their clients.

they have squarely now redefined me and are incapable of reconstruction or plastic surgery.
they are incapable of meeting a wonderful individual, who they prefer to redefine and call the guards, rather than face the truth of their dynamic and accept the responsibility.  Mishandling vulnerability and cause and effect, is unprofessional, and a lot need retraining to regain skills lost in the nappy stages.

i rest my case, i will hold true to my personal integrity but the damage has been immense of my psyche, my ability to trust the HSE in any shape or form.

it isn't up to me to build a relationship from rubble of war, its up to the HSE to build my pillar of strength, put back them bricks that held me firm, and start again at seeing me as i always was, not what they wish to define me as.

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