i met the hse official.
remember the one i told you i was about to?
this was a visit about sofa risers to make it easier for me to get out of a sofa where i spend a good deal lying down.
and about a small chair for inside the bath.
the sofa risers were discussed on her last visit.
she then drove 32 miles back to her office and decided to discuss this with her colleague.
she then came back to me, 32miles and told me the discussion took place and it was decided that as my wrists are quite weak then there was no point helping me out of the sofa as i had nothing with arms and needed to be in a chair!
if you have arthritic knees then, it surely helps a lot to get you in a position to raise further by pressing the body weight against the sofa.
but you cannot do this from so low down.
this had me in disbelief that they could even work this one out and sort of belief it the theory of it all.
so i was to abandon resting up, and sit in a chair.
that's the solution then.
i asked about the bath chair.
she forgot her measuring tape last time and so she was going to measure this this time.
now if we think of the economics of all this.
the round trips of over 50miles a visit and the petrol costs of this, not to mention how many she could be visiting in her own catchment area and not travelling to another would cost for the risers themselves and more besides.
so they do this next.
but this too is not even cost effective, its laughable in its expense due to pettiness and nothing else.
the poor lady then had to hear my despair, cos i just broke down.
the hse has that effect on me.
i asked what hope i had of getting the famous wheelchair if they rejected my wish for risers to the sofa to get me off of it?
we then had a question and answer session about the wheelchair.
i refused an assessment but this was looking very like one.
'no no just wanted to chat to you about this.'
that's an assessment.
i have had five already and this now is a sixth.
she seemed not to be aware that my neurologist had asked the hse to sort the issues of a proper wheelchair for me.
she hadn't seen the letters he had sent.
nor did she seem to understand who he was or what his name was.
she then asked me for permission to speak with my GP to find out more about my conditions.
well that's all in my files going back like and i have been sick for a long time.
the GP is relatively new and i hardly see him so what more can he tell her.
well she wanted to know about my medication.
what has that got to do with it.
was it because i was cracking up and heaving with bawling tears and maybe she wanted to see if i was on anti-depressants and so can call this a nutcase here.
i read her mind instantly and said by the way i am very very depressed but it wont be anti-D's that can cure this. it could be a better service, a kinder hse and a wheelchair.
i asked her to leave because the crying was now uncontrollable and her very presence was reminding me of the hatred i felt for the austerity measures the way they treat you and the poor little grey haired lady bottles on out and left me in a heap.
she to drive back to wicklow over 30 miles away and me to lie down on the sofa.
its no wonder the sick and disabled do not cry out and are heard.
because they have no say, they can effect no change in their lives at the local levels and so they do not bother.
its all at the highest levels now. the gang of four really. the minister for health who has decimated the health service and then the taoiseach and tanaiste and finally the minister with special responsibility for disability.
but after that you cannot get the word in edge ways.
remarking to another after a further discussion on yesterday i told her, sure this is called 'a dictatorship' this isn't democracy at all!
its Haiti all over, its the hated Cuba, its Che Guevara and everyone hated all this.
but no Ireland is lauded as the good little country of Europe.
we are no dictators. we may not be, but someone is and its at a higher level than little Ireland, its at the core of Bonn and not bahola.