a stain on my landscape - the HSE and accountability

There is nothing worse in life than to take a Life.

Taking of life in all its forms, is obhorrent and death, (as in a killing) - shedding blood and ending the heart beat is not the only way this can be done.
There is a slow torturous way and I have felt it.  I have been at the receiving end of a harrowing period of my time on this earth.

Last quarters of life in a normal existence can and should be peaceful and in someway restful, calm and enjoyable.
If naturally you cannot attain that through personal sorrows i would find that understandable and believable. If sadness, shock, trauma and severe trauma at that comes at this delicate period of a person's life and is caused by STATE then this is a crime.
remember the term of 'STATE'.  State is a body that as a body is enlisted to help its members, the people.
The State, that is, all forms of State rule and oversight form one purpose, 'oversight' and this 'oversight' is further divided into areas of ownership, e.g Law, Health, Policing, Housing, Finance et al.
Any one of these, who illegally disrupts the status quo, knowingly disrupts the life of its citizens by illegal means is committing a crime.

to hurt and harm an individual in the state whilst claiming to uphold the health of the nation is a crime.
To hurt and harm an individual in the NAME of its function, healthcare is even worse.
To damage a person who can then see no way out of profound trauma and is living a life of hell is a crime.    Living a life of torture during a time when she should be at peace with herself, her world and making peace with her future death and fragile state is a crime of Murder.

I see the death of a person as the most horrific event in a person's life, unless of course she/he feels at that time, it will come as a relief.   
If the person, in sickness,  had the ability to be at peace and had help to live then that should be the aim of society.

The aim of any healthcare system is not to deconstruct the human persona, but to assist in enabling the person live a healthy and wholesome life and lifestyle.  Anything short of this is using the brief of 'healthcare services' in a twarted fashion and not upholding the role placed on a person who has the skill to make life better for a sick person.
Over and over I have been victim to the abusive services of healthcare in Ireland.
I have been hurt, damaged and defamed by healthcare personnel.  I have been severely traumatised by healthcare personnel who take ownership over a persons rights, rather than enable a person.
Naming the HSE as the cause of deep and profound trauma is something i never envisaged doing at the end of my days, there is no doubt in my mind who caused such severe pain.  No doubt at all.

I am heartened to see written down confirmation that others see it this way too.
i have known others have witnessed my personal pain and heard my voice and cry to be heard.   It has been heard and has been believed.

To me that is good.  It is the confirmation that porkies are not being bandied about by myself, for I have always been honest and truthful to a fault.
Having Asperger syndrome I guess has helped my moral fibre, for people with Asperger syndrome do find it difficult to lie.  I have to say i find it strange and profoundly difficult to do anything other than tell the full truth and nothing but the truth.
I couldn't rest easily in bed at night if i had lied, i never lie.
It pleases me greatly that i have such high expectations of myself over lying.
It pleases me enormously to understand the concept around moral fibre, moral duty and the ability to stay with the truth at all times.

Concepts around abuse and suffering and scheming and lying are gross to me.   To hurt a person is a horrible thing.
I would not want it.  I would not wish it but i have been at the receiving end of it - from the HSE.
Never have the HSE actually held ownership of moral fibre to say 'mai culpa, mai maxima culpa'
Never have the HSE apologised without innuendo in a scheming way as to call say a dreadful statement which is seen as callous be glossed over and out as 'a quip.'  This is how they do not apologise well.   Therefore, do not apologise at all.
One complaint about seeing a statement on file which was HORRENDOUS for this blogger, was to the HSE 'a quip'  just 'a quip.'  The viewing by the person of her statement as 'a quip' is contrary to her verbal statement of 'i would be appalled if i knew i had said something like that.'  I told this HSE official to be prepared to be appalled and showed where I saw she had written it down.
Her horror had turned into 'quip', she wasn't horrified.   She apologised for her 'quip,' downgrading her horror  in a sentence to a 'slip of the tongue in her written statement, the 'quip.' of it!
It didn't seem hard for her to acknowledge a 'quip' in writing or acknowledge how appalled she would be if she had said such a thing, but then acknowledging  it as a 'quip' says a lot to me.   All the wrong way of dealing with her acknowledgement of being appalled if she had said it.
She did, she wasn't as appalled in writing!

A deceased counsellor of the state writes, 'ann and margaret ...have been badly served by the state but horrendously so in recent years.' is testament that we as good people had been heard by another who was adored by community until her untimely death.
She heard us, witnessed some of our distress at the hands of the HSE and wrote it as it was.

She also reminded the HSE of their role in our life, and their duty to us, and didn't say we had to have a duty to the HSE in return. For that is not the role we played in this life, but they certainly had a remit to uphold their brief to provide a decent healthcare system of care in a caring manner, which she reminded them they were not doing.
Further another complaint upheld for both twins, the HSE had been requested to sort a mess and further, they were told of their duty to us, as opposed to what our duty should be to the HSE in all things.

The acceptance by the HSE that they should be able and strong to face all difficult situations with total committment and professionalism was dictated by this investigator.  Not to need, demand or expect a type of incestuous gratitude which may see them withdraw support and help if they didn't get that!  one such person blaming their lack of job satisfaction towards us as our fault when we see what it really is.
the hurt they have inflicted has been so bad, we consistently remind them of it.
This doesn't give them their job satisfaction but then to remind them they have to be professional may be viewed again as the thorn that is in their side when honest people face them with the truth and nothing but the truth, so help us god.

To me, in a once caring society, upholding care for all its citizens seems a chore, a financial burden and an unnessary part of job descriptions.
its like as if its secondary to the wonderful reports, and the policy documents around which their work is based.
the work itself is sort of a tag on and a type of begrudgingly offered part of the remit if they like you, definitely if they dislike you you can hope for the worst.
We have faced the worst.
Lessons on all of this really doesnt get heard and lesssons are not learnt by this State body.

the snappers at the heel of the HSE will be snapping because they are truthful, honourable and hate injustice.
you won't get snappers at the heels of anyone, if someone does good, snappers are far less, but snappers will snap if harm has been done.

I say to the HSE, isnt it time...time to learn a big lesson here?
What if i was a brother or sister to you in real terms, look at it from that perspective, how well would you receive such treatment to a loved one, if you witnessed it in your own family group especially if the family member was vulnerable?
would you stand by and accept it, or would you be angry, upset and snap sometimes viciously at the hurt another is inflicting on your family member?  
you would.
You could do far better than this, i say.
You could make a better fist at being professional in what you are trained to do.